videographer/sound designer/musician/human.

A year ago today I was baptized as a Roman Catholic, and renamed Lawrence Francis. It’s been a journey into exoteric and esoteric methods and history. The Transfiguration in itself is too beautiful to comprehend logically, yet faith is akin to falling in love and trust. There are many deserts and beautiful plateaus. Sweet sparrows, and slick scorpions.
This journey will never end.
May peace be with you!!

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An older female customer in her late seventies asked me about using Psilocybin because she’s dealing with heavy anger issues. In a roundabout way, I questioned her about how she thought it would help. She had no definite answer. So I tried to explain that it’s not a cure, but a tool to reaching divinity within oneself; as in, the Ego screams for attention, but in reality, the Ego does not exist.
Then she exclaimed, “I don’t want to turn into a wing-nut Catholic like you. You should really stick with the Buddhist stuff. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be mean, but I say what I feel.”
I laughed, and said, “I remember telling you about my experience, and I know you’re already a Catholic and seem to be a wing-nut, so there’s nothing to fear. And I gotta say, once a Buddhist, always a Buddhist!”
She stepped back, and with teary eyes, said, “I can trust you, your heart is pure.”
Then we talked about esoteric Wiccan stuff for twenty minutes.
Just another day in retail.

View from 633 W. Wisconsin Ave., Suit 1400. Looking west.

Yesterday, Wednesday 22, 2023 I had to leave work with a medical emergency. Part of my vision, on the left side, became pixelated and out of focus. A little more than 1/4 of my vision was distorted in a pixelated mess. I became scared. I dropped what I was doing and looked out the nearest window, to focus on long-distance movement, like buses and folks walking their dogs. I asked for my blood pressure to be taken (long story), but another co worker suffers from heart problems and has a “cuff” at work for monitoring. My readings were above normal. A co-worker asked if I needed to go to the clinic (that exists across the street from where we work), and without hesitation I agreed.
I was driven to the clinic by my beloved co-worker and dropped off. I filled out the paperwork and was rushed in. After preliminary tests everything was normal. The doctor on the scene ordered a follow up on March 23 at an Eye Specialist.

Today, Thursday 23, 2023. I got to the eye doctor early, and waited for 2 1/2 hours. I believe I fell asleep at least twice. They were short staffed and I was called last. The initial nurse was to die for. We small talked about the warmth of coffee, and the sweetness of caffeine. I kept bringing up “caffeine indulgence” to everyone, but it was a laughing matter. Once the doctor came in, my eyes were heavily dilated and my vision was seriously blurred and distorted. The doctor did their tests, and we small talked.

“Damn, I thought I was having a stroke!! But I had no headache or anything.”
“You know, as we get older, sometimes migraines don’t pronounce pain, but just side effects. One time I was riding my bike and sweating, but trying to keep hydrated and visual distortions started to happen. It was like I was on a convertor belt… I was pedaling forward, but moving backward.” Said the doctor.

I wanted to hug him. David A. Scheidt, OD, your bedside manner is world class, I love you.

All tests aside, I’m fine. I’m going back for a follow-up exam and to get a new eye prescription for some new glasses in a few weeks, FINALLY.

Having one of those days where some lines are crossed resulting in a springtime freedom that’s difficult to explain. It’s more of a feeling. One of rebirth and open plateaus, misty mornings and beautiful coffee, singing birds and green foliage everywhere.

And this song: